Do you need a friend?

 

Someone who knows everything about you?  You know, the kind you don’t have to explain why you are the way you are.  When you’re together with this person you’re so at peace.  You know you don’t have to take care of them, you don’t have to do anything, just hang out.  And they’ll be listening to everything you have to say because they want to!  Not just to be polite.  That was my conversation with God yesterday.

I’ve begun to try something new with God.  It’s called listening.  I’m pretty good at telling God my problems, and complaining as well, but listening?  Well, that’s definitely not my strength.  I decided to try out this new brilliant idea  while I go on walks.  I take a full hour (it takes that long to get me to listen) and usually begin my walk with worry.  There are so many things that I need to think about, contemplate, figure out, solve, and that’s usually where my mind goes.  Many times I get myself into despair, as I finally have time to think about my problems, and then that there is no answer.  So, I’ll try to find someone to blame as though that’s going to help.  Let’s see, who’s responsible for my dilemma today?

I quickly remember that I need to keep my eyes open for rattlesnakes and quit being so self focused.  A few months ago we saw a couple of them right beside the trail and they love to come out into the sun.  Isn’t that what life is like?  We have to stand firm in our faith, believing God has a good plan, and keep our spiritual eyes open for the devil.  For our battle is not against flesh and blood but against spiritual forces in the heavenly places.  What has now happened?  I realize that the past 10 minutes I have filled my head full of angry thoughts and accusations.  I wonder how I got into that place?  I remember my spiritual mom Germaine, who helped me memorize my scripture and understand who I am in Christ and I quickly begin rebuking the devil.  “In the name of Jesus, I command all bad thoughts, pictures and hopelessness to leave and I ask God that you would send your angels to surround me and give me good thoughts, your thoughts, amen.”  Even while I’m praying I’m not sure it’s going to work but I know I need to pray.

There, that simple.  A simple prayer that carries a lot of weight.  Instantly I’m singing a song “Blessed be the name of the Lord”.  And I’m so happy.  How does that work?  To go from despair to joy.  Only Jesus can do that.  I love the words to this song.

Blessed Be Your Name
In the land that is plentiful
Where Your streams of abundance flow
Blessed be Your name

Blessed Be Your name
When I’m found in the desert place
Though I walk through the wilderness
Blessed Be Your name

Every blessing You pour out
I’ll turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say

Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name

Blessed be Your name
When the sun’s shining down on me
When the world’s ‘all as it should be’
Blessed be Your name

Blessed be Your name
On the road marked with suffering
Though there’s pain in the offering
Blessed be Your name

Every blessing You pour out
I’ll turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say

Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name

Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name

You give and take away
You give and take away
My heart will choose to say
Lord, blessed be Your name

Amazing!  I pray and the Lord gives me a song to sing.  I like this, as I hiked merrily along the mountain trail.  Thankfully I was the only one on the trail, except that dog who just looked at me strangely as if to say, “Hmm, those humans, very strange.  Just smile and nod.”

We’re coming up on a half hour of hike now and I’m feeling pretty good!  Oh yes, the goal is to hear from the Lord regarding what is to become of us?  We’ve made some pretty drastic changes in our lives, thinking that we had heard from Him, and thought we were heading in a direction and suddenly, we appear to be dead in the water.  Not moving.  Pretty alone.  What now Lord?  I try to quiet my heart and my mind.  Difficult stuff to quiet my mind, but I know if I pray, God can help me.

I come to a question that really hurts my heart and I try not to ask it anymore because it just hasn’t happened and I’m trying to just be brave.  “God, do you have a friend for me?  A friend who knows me and can worship You with me?  I know you’ve given me Mike and I love that, but sometimes I need a girlfriend.  Like the ones you gave me in Omaha.  Do you have one for me?”

And then another song comes into my head. Love this way of communicating.

“What a friend we have in Jesus”.  Wow!  Where did that song come from?  It had to be in the outer most part of my mind, from my childhood, stored away in some dusty bin.  I’m near the end of the trail now, and I’m coming out onto the main road.  Well, I’ll be, I’m starting to remember the words.  It’s pretty perfect for my situation.  God, you are soooo cool!  I quickly take my iphone and sing into it (because I have such an amazing voice haha), because there is an application on there that I can sing into and it will give me the song.  Sure enough, up it pops with a country western singer.  Ha!  That is definitely from my childhood.  Dad loved those country western singers.  I’m walking through the grounds of the San Ysidro Ranch, singing/playing  my iphone out loud (because I don’t have headphones), “What a Friend We have in Jesus”.  Very fun.

What a friend we have in Jesus
All our sins and greifs to bear
What a privilege to carry
Everything to God in pray’r.

O what peace we often forfeit
O what needless pain we bear
All because we do not carry
Everything to God in pray’r.

Have we trials and temptations
Is there trouble anywhere?
We should never be discourag’d
Take it to the Lord in pray’r.

Can we find a friend so faithful
Who will all our sorrows share?
Jesus knows our ev’ry weakness
Take it to the Lord in pray’r.

Are we weak and heavy laden
Cumber’d with a load of care?
Precious Saviour, still our refuge
Take it to the Lord in pray’r.

Do your friends despise, forsake thee?
Take it to the Lord in pray’r
In His arms He’ll take and sheild thee
Thou wilt find a solace there…

I love you Jesus.  You’re the best friend a girl could have.

Love,

Robbie

May 5, 2009

P.S.  The most fun was coming home and sharing my story with Mike and Christian.  They thought it was nice, patted me on the head and went off.  Suddenly Christian came back and said “You know, I told God I wanted to have a song too! and here’s the one he gave me”  You’ve got a friend in me.  From Toy Story.  Isn’t that great?  He was so happy.   Spread the good news!